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Randy travels North...

Thursday, September 29, 2005
Back to BOSTON!!!! Oh my how I have missed my city. Not the drama. Not the baggage. Not the bad memories. But I have missed my friends and I have missed my home. Honestly its really good to be going back, I feel like I left too abruptly and without a chance to say goodbye (I'm sure I'm not the only one).

At the same time its been really good to be gone and on the move again. So all in all its nice to have a place that I love to go back to, but I am also totally confident that it was the right decision to leave. I think its no coincidence that after 1504 Comm. Ave. disintegrated all of the originals (Adam and Dan and I...sorry Steve) are now in some way romantically involved with a ladyfriend (what a stupid way to say that...), yet while we lived together not only was there a two year drought, but two years of suckiness with sucky relationships and sucky stretches of time where there were nary a woman in sight, let alone one that wanted to go out with us (I guess we should have tried asking girls out seperately, instead of all three of us asking the same girl out at the same time...we had sure had some growing up to do...). So clearly it was the wisest decision to leave.

I remember my shock and, to some degree, dismay when I heard back in May that Adam and Dan were going to dinner with girls...TOGETHER!? (meaning Adam and Dan were going out with girls...not them together with a lesbian couple...come on guys, I like the gays and all, they're a gentle and clean people, but I wouldn't live with some of 'em) Then and there I knew we had broken free of the evil hex Paula Friedman had placed upon us. Our journey through the valley of the shadow of sucky women had ended, and we had reached the promised land (when Caylin reads this, she will break up with me. Everyone keep it a secret from her). I don't mean this in a creepy, "heavy breathing" kind of way, I just mean its nice to be seeing someone of the opposite sex on a regular basis again.

So anyways, I'll be up there through the weekend, we leave monday morning. Caylin is gonna be visiting her sister in Providence, but we'll have a few days to hang out in Boston. Hopefully I'll get to see the Sox crush the Yankees, but we'll see. Anyways, see you weirdos in a few days.

Caption Contest!

Saturday, September 24, 2005
Hey so I know that this is Dan's thing, the whole "Caption Contest", but at least I credit him for it, I'm not some dirty filcher who steals the humor and wit of other people, I'm not someone who is so completely devoid of creativity that I ingratiate myself to and befriend others only in order to leech off their own talent. But yeah, whoever writes the best caption wins can have me write a posting on a topic of their choosing (exciting, I know). So post away on the following image:
Now click on the "No Comments" link below to post your own comment with a caption on this pic.

News in the world of Me and Motorcycles...

Friday, September 23, 2005
So some of you know that I've wanted to get a motorcycle for some time now. In fact the money I made this summer was going to go towards getting a motorcycle, but instead it went towards other stuff, like when I hit someone while driving Tim's dad's van...but thats another story for another time, most likely when the court case is over and the court-ordered publicity gag has expired (you can expect a book deal and a made-for-T.V. movie). So obviously that didn't happen, and I am without a motorcycle.

However, since I came to Athens, and since mother nature decided to get crunk on oil operations in the Gulf of Mexico, and especially since I broke the valve on the front wheel of my bike, my quest for two-wheeled motorized (motor being the operative word) transportation has resumed with much ado and urgency. I recently had the opportunity to purchase a 1985 Honda Trail CT 110.

Now, being that I know nothing about motorcycles and have no experience with them beyond fantasizing about having one when I ride my bike while I make motor noises, and that time I rented a scooter in the Virgin Islands, i had no idea when I expect when I recieved a call from an amicable man who introduced himself as Ellis (immediately I did not trust him) offering to sell me his CT 110 for the reasonable price of $400. Though I would not trust a man with such a name any more than I would trust a dirty immigrant fresh off the boat (if you get the joke, you'll realize how bad it was. If you don't, go read a history book), I decided to go have a looksee.

This is what I saw:So I know what your thinking. Its ridiculous looking. This is, if I may be so eloquent to say so, the "short bus" of the motorcycle world. This is the motorcycle that got picked last in motorcycle kickball, and made fun of by all the other motorcycles and couldn't get a date in motorcycle high school.

But beneath all this I see something that is beautiful, albeit extremely dorky. I see an opportunity to own my own "hog" (or, in this case, "piglet"). To tame the open road (at 45 mph)! To be at one with with the asphalt (and due to the abscence of a windscreen, lots of cicadas and mosquitos). To just pick up and ride until I can't ride any farther (which, due to a gas tank sized at 1.7 gallons, will probably not be much farther than Duluth). These are the reasons I had this dream in the first place, and by golly, at $400 who can pass it up.

After much soul searching (and bank balance checking) I've decided I'm going to call Ellis tomorrow and take him up on his offer. Hopefully the Red Baron (as I've aptly named her in anticipation of a long and loving relationship) will be mine. A man can dream.

The earth is PISSED (an actual semi-serious posting!)

Wednesday, September 21, 2005
Sheesh earth, lets talk about this. Before you let Rita go and do something rash, let me at least say this: I mean, we're sorry for polluting the rainforest and killing the whales, but in all honesty, is it really fair to subject the Manning family to another hurricane!? Think of your impact on football! If you take out Houston, that means New Orleans AND Houston will have to go to other stadiums to play their "home" games this season, so that people from other can hold up half-hearted signs supporting them, when in reality they are just grateful they don't live in crappy places like Houston! I mean Archie Manning went on ABC to tell the world how bad conditions are, that he was "roughing it" at his son's Oxford, MS mansion. This is terrible, oh the humanity. Your kicking us while we're down over here!

No but seriously, I hope all this gets the American people to wake up a little. I'm NOT saying I support hurricanes hitting us, its a terrible thing what nature can do. When I see people on TV who have lost everything I feel confused and helpless. But this outpouring of support, while touching and heartfelt, is a little confusing too. Why don't we see this when things like this happen elsewhere? In 2001, 20,000 people died in an earthquake in Gujarat, India. In 2003 over 26,000 people died in Bam, India. Only last year, more than 3,000 people died in Haiti from hurricane Jean. Where was the $5 million donation from Toyota then? When did the NFL do a money drive for the people in India? I dunno guys, I'm not some self-hater, I love the United States, but it does make us seem a little jaded. On the news the other day, I saw a rather large woman holding her two rather large children, saying that all she had eaten in the last 5 days was a can of tuna and a box of twinkies, and she was crying. Its not that I wouldnt feel like that if I was alone and had to support my kids, but a twinkie is enough to meet the daily caloric needs of millions of people. Anyways, I'll get off my soapbox, but I just hope there can be a little more sobriety. Terrible things happen ALL around us, but we're just really safe from that here in the U.S., and we should be grateful and let that gratitude show. I know thats what we're doing here domestically, but shouldn't we be doing that abroad too? I mean especially with all thats going on right now in the world, we NEED to be showing people that we care TOO. OK, I could go on and on if you let me, but thats my tirade for the day, now back to being irreverent and spiteful:

On the whole "irreverent and spiteful" note, let me share these thoughts with you:

"New Orleans was a crappy city. Sure it had great culture and amazing musical history, but it was also built IN A SWAMP and was a poster child for how urban sprawl can destroy the character and heritage of a community... I mean if the two most signifigant cultural landmarks the news channels can come up with about your city are Bourbon Street and the Superdome, well then your city isn't that great. I guess what I'm saying is if your city is known for voodoo, girls showing their hoo-ha's and a sub-par football team...well maybe it was time for a renovation anyways."
-Anonymous

Confused? How can I be compassionate AND post the evil (yet true) thoughts of a fellow blogger all at the same time. Well, your observing the walking dichotomy that is D.H. Bathon.

Fun with my new camera phone...

Tuesday, September 20, 2005
Here I can be seen at the exact moment of realization that I have missed my first class of the calendar year. On the day a presentation was due...*sigh*
Ah the joys of being able to capture inane moments on film (well, flash memory really). Sorry Aislinn...
Caylin and I in the Richmond Airport.

Grace drowning like whats-his-face in Titanic. Either that or she is jumping out of the shadows at me...or my flash sucks.
Surprise SLC visit. Az was looking at animal cruelty websites, so I got bored and decided to take this picture instead. I'm starting to spend a lot of time at the SLC, usually pretending that I am doing something, or doing nothing at all, openly disregarding those around me. Including that gaylord that was sitting next to Dan last night.

Any-whozzlebees (as Drizzle would say...in fact I have some vague memory of being friends with her once...but that must have been a LONG time ago, in a land far distant from here), thats about it for now. Remember, I'm slowly working myself back into posting regularly.

OK so its getting ridiculous.

Monday, September 19, 2005
So here is my lengthy explanation for not posting in over a month (yet another month long hiatus...you are becoming used to this, I'm sure.):

I hate you.

No, just kidding (not about hating you, that just wasn't the "lengthy" explanation).

I tried posting twice this month. Both times I was almost done posting and either through some error or because this stupid Blogger.com website uses Java with no save feature as its primary posting tool, I would lose the post. Both of them were very good posts by the way, the kind that would have launched me into a week-or-so long flurry of funny thoughts and anecdotes. I really am trying to keep up with this posting thing, but I've lost so many good posts to this stupid Java feature that its really draining the life out of me, I mean you spend two hours on something only to lose it? Well that just sucks.

But anyways, here I am, so of course I'll do my obligatory "What Has Happened Over the Last Month That is of Somewhat Notable Importance" part of my usual "Back From A Long Hiatus In Posting" post.

1.) I moved to Georgia. Yes, after Sam's wedding, I was in fact accepted to University of Puget Sound and University of Denver, but instead for reasons far beyond the scope and focus of this humorous blog, I decided to move back to Athens, GA and attend Gainesville College in the hopes of transferring back to UGA and becoming a Fine Arts major in the Lamar Dodd School of Art. That, in a nutshell, has probably been the biggest and most important decision I have made in some time. But anyways, back to the list.
2.) School started. Taking four classes: Intro to Linguistics, Abnormal Psychology, Computer Information Systems and Film and Culture. I've been working hard (seriously) and so far I've gotten two A's on tests and an A on a paper. It would be foolish to expect this to continue, if my past performance is any indication, this will soon taper off. But I'm enjoying this miniscule taste of success while it lasts.
3.) I have a girlfriend. She is great. She likes me, I like her. Holla. Her name is Caylin, here is a nice and pleasant photograph of her and I at her brothers' birthday party:
4.) The second Bathon cousin wedding occured this weekend (9/17), Greg, the oldest Bathon cousin got hitched.
5.) I rented a house with my good friend Mr. Paul Gallois. Since my last adventure in Athens, he has graduated and is now working at ATCO Heating and Air. 'Aim High' is his personal motto.
6.) Everyone in Georgia is now a Red Sox fan, and it annoys the &%$@ out of me. They all assume since I am from Boston I can tell you exactly if and when the Red Sox are playing a game on that particular day, and they all ask if I liked Fever Pitch. The answers are A.) I don't know and I don't care, after X amount of years following this team and stressing through their ups and downs and ins and outs, I just need a year off. I don't care anymore, we've got our one, even though I'm from Boston, I feel as if I've earned a year off from worrying about this team. and then B.) No, Jimmy Fallon sucks and so do you for thinking that movie in anyway has anything to do with Boston or succesfully tapped into the consciousness of the city. The movie sucked, and you suck for liking it. No romantic starring an idiot like Jimmy Fallon and vapid, silly woman like Drew Barrymore (her friggin' production company is named Flower Films!!! And women wonder why they aren't taken seriously in the business world...) will ever be able to succesfully capture nearly a century of anguish and perserverance that went on in this city over a baseball team. Men lived and DIED waiting for the Red Sox to win a series and you think some MOVIE is going to make me get all giddy inside!??!? Bah!
7.) Wow, that was a tirade...
8.) I got a ticket for 80 mph in a 70. Thats 10 miles over. I was going with the flow of traffic. I was pulled over because I am young (and black). There is no justice in this world.

Anyways, thats enough for now. Caylin, sorry for putting you on the website, but I like this picture and the world must know of your hotness. That is all. Goodnight